A story about Mallowbreeze
NOTE: This story contains absolutely fictional characters that are not used in the FlameClan Roleplay. Existing characters will only be used with the owner's permission, and will have links to their articles.
I'm going to leave soon.
Well, not exactly leave. But I have a feeling that I'm... departing. Like, I feel a finality on everything. A... conclusion. Yes, that's it. I'm concluding. Concluding my life in FlameClan, a life of trials, sadness, and bittersweet happiness.
So before I conclude I ask you- no, I beg you- to hear this last memoir of one of the only elders of FlameClan. Please... this is my last wish before I go. Hear the story...
Hear the story of Mallowkit, dying kit of FlameClan.
Hear the story of Mallowpaw, failing apprentice of FlameClan.
Hear the story of Mallowbreeze, the one surviving elder of FlameClan.
Hear the story of what could have been but never was.
Before I start my story, I want to tell you about my parents.
Neither were well-known or critical members of their Clan, but to me they were the world. My mother, Silverwhisper, was beautiful in her own quiet way. Her dappled, silvery pelt fills my early memories as a kit. It was like a river... I remember drifting to sleep at night imagining it was a silver river carrying me all the way to the stars. Her scent brings back memories of my kitten days, silly and foolish desires to be leader. Desires she would praise me for as my father teased me on my ambitions.
My father. Bravelight. Maybe he's not a hero to the Clan, but he's a hero to me. He told me stories of great badger fights, times when he fought beside his Clan, strike for strike, blow for blow. If only he could have fought beside me like that.
Both of these parents were solid, fixed presences in my mind that gradually became ghosts. My dear mother left to StarClan before she knew about my 'condition'. She died a death that she didn't deserve, fighting a hopeless battle against greencough. Her dead body is forever burned into my mind, but I hope she's happy somewhere up in the stars.
As for my father... he faded quicker than she did. When he heard about my condition, he was already far away in another world where I didn't exist. My mother's death broke him entirely from the inside and from the outside. He tried to forget her and me. He never once met my gaze after that. Never once called me ' Little Leader' again.
But they were good cats. Unknown to most, but good cats. I guess they did the best they could have for me. Silverwhisper's soft voice sometimes echoes in my lonely dreams these days. That's why I know for certain I'm concluding.
I was born on one of the coldest days of the season. Silverwhisper had me early in the morning when the sun hadn't even risen. By the time the medicine cat got there, she had a little grey-and-white bundle next to her. That bundle was named Mallowkit for the first herb she saw the medicine cat bring in. Not a very inspirational naming story, but it was my name.
I don't recall any siblings, alive or dead. Confusingly, there's a memory of a Goldkit beside me, some voices calling to he/she. Maybe it was another kit. I don't know for sure. My parents have never told me because I never asked.
The birth was a difficult one, and my mother lost a lot of blood. She was very weak after we were born and could not feed us. Due to my poor memory I can't recall the name of the queen that nursed me. But I know she was a kind cat with bright eyes that were either amber or black.
I opened my eyes when expected. They were the green of my mother's. My father joked about how happy he was that he had a unique eye color since his kit didn't have them. My mother playfully swiped at him. I remember laughing my head off because she accidentally hit him hard and made him fall on his muzzle.
My parents loved each other dearly, I could see that. They teased each other gently, and the extent of their quarreling was complaining about how fat the other was. I felt that they were made perfectly for each other and as a kit I wanted a mate who would be like they were.
So I was raised with love and understanding from both ever since I was younger. I don't recall any playmates. This makes sense since I was told I spent most of the time alone. Warriors have told me how they always saw two pairs of wide green eyes watching them. They laugh when they tell me that once they tried to talk to me, I screamed and ran away. Sounds like me.
I don't have very many memories of my days as a kit, which is peculiar. I guess I've wasted your time telling you about my patchy memories, but the thing I wanted to get across was that there was nothing wrong with me at the time. Nothing at all. I was raised normally. I had a loving family. I was rarely, if ever, sick.
So why did it happen?
Chapter II Edit
There are many theories.
Some people say I caught a mild case of my mother's illness. Others say it was a trial from StarClan. I don't know and I don't care. All I know is that out of the blue, my hearing started to fade.
But while I was a normal kit living a normal life, StarClan was planning something. They were planning to take my mother away from me.
Mallowkit was about five moons old. She was starting to loose her kit fuzz and was starting to grow her teeth. They hurt as they grew, so the she-kit was chewing on the edge of the nest.
" Mallowkit, stop that," Silverwhisper said gently to her, pulling Mallowkit away from the unfortunate nest with her tail. She handed Mallowkit a mouse tail. " Chew on this instead."
" Eww!" Mallowkit wrinkled up her nose. She batted the tail away with her soft white paws. The tail swung away from her, then promptly swung back. Mallowkit yelped as it stung her cheek, but as kits do, she bounced back fast. Letting out a small, mock growl, the grey-and-white kit pounced for the object.
" Don't play with fresh-kill," Silverwhisper chided, drawing the tail away from the kit. To distract her attention, Silverwhisper rolled up a ball of moss and tossed it at her daughter. Squealing in delight, Mallowkit batted it back to her mother. Silverwhisper purred and softly butted it with her muzzle. The ball rolled slowly down to Mallowkit, who hit it with all her might. The ball flew out of the nest.
" Sorry!" Mallowkit apologized. Silverwhisper merely purred and stretched forwards with her muzzle, picking up the ball. She tossed it back to Mallowkit who did the same in return. Purring and squealing, the two of them played their game.
Then, without warning, Silverwhisper let out a hacking cough.
Mallowkit froze. The ball thumped onto the ground. " Mama?"
" I'm... okay-" Silverwhisper wheezed, then another cough shook her body. Mallowkit winced. It looked so painful... the she-cat's slender body heaved as she coughed. A series of those gutteral, awful coughs followed this. Silverwhisper's eyes turned milky.
" Mama!" Mallowkit wailed. She didn't know what to do. Frantically searching the nursery and seeing nothing, she bounded out of her nest and into the clearing. " Help! Somebody! Mama's coughing!"
Her father looked up from where he was resting in the shade of an overhanging fern. His eyes were sharp with alarm as he bounded up to his daughter.
" Coughing?" he asked frantically. " When? How bad?"
" I don't know," whimpered Mallowkit, pressing her face into her father's side. She stumbled as he drew away from her and raced towards the medicine cat's den. Cats began to murmur around her. She felt scared and alone. A hard stone settled into her stomach. Mallowkit raced back towards the nursery, her tail flying out behind her.
" Stay out!" a deep voice rumbled. Mallowkit skidded to a halt. The medicine cat's eyes peered out at her from he gloom of the den. Panic welled up inside Mallowkit.
" No! She's my mother!" the grey-and-white kit wailed.
" She has greencough," the medicine cat said gravely. " I'd advise you to stay away from her. This can be deadly."
" D-deadly?" Mallowkit gasped. " Will, will she..." her voice trailed off. The eyes darkened a bit.
" Not if I can help it, but I don't want to deal with a sick kit as well. Stay away from your mother, and StarClan willing she'll be well in no time." His voice was optimistic, but it was a mood that didn't match his eyes. Mallowkit'd didn't see this, however, and sagged with relief.
The days past with painful slowness. I was alone in the nursery, cold, trembling, lonely, scared. Every night was torture. I would have nightmares where Silverwhisper was drowning and I couldn't save her. I'd have nightmares where Silverwhisper was telling me how to cure her illness, but I couldn't remember what she was saying. These dreams scared me so much I would wake up and vomit right over the edge of the nest.
I was out of my nest at the crack of dawn, wolfling down some fresh-kill, sunning myself, doing anything not to go back into that horrible nursery. When the warriors began pouring out of their den, I searched for my father. As usual, he raced to the medicine cat's den and vanished inside. He returned soon as he had patrols to go on, but every visit seemed to ruin him. His shoulders slumped when he returned and his eyes were dark and broken inside.
No one payed attention to the little kit who was Silverwhisper's daughter. They were too busy worrying over her mother, comforting her father, and going about their own buisness. Flamestar tried to talk to me once (she was a young leader then) but I could't get my feelings out. How could I tell her about my nights when I was so scared I almost had heart-attacks, my turbulent emotions and fear for my mother? I wonder how open I would have been if I knew she was dying.
I had no sister or brother, I had no friends. All I had for company was misery and anxiety. Watching the den from the shadows, hearing coughs and whimpers. It was pure torture.
Then there was one day when the medicine cat slouched out of the den. He looked exhausted and bedraggled, but his eyes were scanning the clearing for me. When I made eye contact, I knew something was wrong. Dreadfully wrong.
" Come on. We don't have much time," he rasped. My heart nearly stopped beating, but I forced my legs to move. Forced myself to walk towards death.
When I entered it, the den stank of sickness. It made me recoil mentally, but my eyes were fixed on the shuddering shape in the middle of the den. Silverwhisper. Mother. I let out a chocked sob and raced to her side. Her fur was matted and stank. Her eyes were closed, but mucus crusted them so thickly I didn't think she could open them. I whirled around and called out to the medicine cat.
" Why is she so dirty? Why can't you clean her?"
" It won't make a difference. She'll be whole in StarClan." His voice was thick with resignation.
" No! No!" I howled. My dying mother twitched in her sleep. It was as if she heard me, but I knew that couldn't be possible. She was far away now, far away where I couldn't reach her and even if I tried I'd never here her voice or play mossball with her again or fall asleep on a silver river carrying me all the way to the stars or ever smell my mother again...
Here I fainted. When I awoke, my mother was dead and buried.